Perception is a mirror not a fact.
And what I look on is my state of mind, reflected outward.
-
A
Course In Miracles
There is an interesting aspect of quantum mechanics called
“entanglement.” What this means is that
two electrons that have become connected through interacting continue to be
connected even if they are several thousand light years apart (or several
billion for that matter.) Albert
Einstein found this discovery very disturbing and tried to prove that it was
mistaken. However subsequent experiments
have proven that it is very much the case.
What this means is that on a basic level we are all
interconnected. What we think, do and
feel effects the rest of the universe instantly. Humanity is deeply interconnected on the
level of our DNA. We vibrate, rise, fall
and suffer together. When Jesus taught
us to take care of the poorest among us, he meant that they are us. We don’t have to invoke some mystical
spiritual level of being; in terms of the basic construct of matter, we are
one.
The individual ego, or “I am” is a concept based on false
premises. I might have a local,
individual identity, but it is entirely relative and based in a substratum of
universality. The universe is conscious
and alive experiencing itself in and through our particular vantage points. When we cling to the ego’s perspective exclusively
we wreck havoc on our souls and create suffering for ourselves and others. When we expand our view, allowing others
under our umbrella of care and concern, then we promote peace and healing. As the Dalai Lama has said, “All suffering is
caused by ignorance. People inflict pain on others in the selfish pursuit of
their own happiness or satisfaction”
One way that the ego holds onto its illusory reality is
through emotions such as resentment, guilt, contempt, jealousy, disgust or
pride. When we hold on to this kind of
energy we shut ourselves off from the universal life force, or prana. In turn it creates imbalance and illness
within our psycho-somatic beings. Often
we try to justify our position through various rationalizations. I have met so many intelligent people who use
their intelligence primarily to defend their suffering. We create a mental prison for ourselves and
argue against the one who would release us.
Gratitude is a profound stepping stone on our path to
authentic love. Instead of nursing past
grievances we can try remembering instances of positive experiences. Even in those instances where we might have
been truly and maliciously harmed, we might consider what lessons that teacher
(albeit unconscious) had for us. This
doesn’t mean telling a bully who has hurt you “thank you may I have
another.” It means accepting life
lessons. It means refocusing, reframing
and reorienting ourselves. Appreciate
what is good in your life experience right now.
If nothing else you are alive to have this experience.
Practicing gratitude changes the brain and lifts us out of
depression. It opens the door of our
mental prison and allows us to step out into the sunlight. Although we can be grateful for past
experiences, it is also possible to simply let the past go and open to the joy
of this present moment. This present
moment is always something to be grateful for as long as we aren’t comparing it
to some past or imaginary experience.
Forgiveness and gratitude go hand in hand. It is hard to feel grateful when holding on
to grievances. Sometimes it is difficult
to let go. However we have to remember
that we are imprisoned by our thoughts of resentment not the other person. We poison our bodies with toxic emotions and
close ourselves off from healing grace.
While anger, resentment and fear separate us from love, forgiveness
reconnects us with the wholeness of being.
It is an internal state.
Forgiveness doesn’t always mean that we give someone the
opportunity to hurt us again. Trust,
once broken, takes time to repair if it can be repaired at all. Forgiveness on the other hand means letting
go of anger, resentment and desire for vengeance. It means letting go and moving forward with
life. The reality is that we can always
be hurt when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable. Worse than the pain though is inner deadness
because we have closed ourselves off from others and the world.
If we are honest, we might see that much of our
anger and resentment is based on our own expectations of others. Gratitude and forgiveness mean accepting
others and things as they are. If we
open to the world this way we are not likely to get hurt – because we are free from
attachment. So the first step in
practicing forgiveness might be recognizing how we ourselves have manufactured
our grievances. Then, of course, we have
to forgive ourselves!
